Actress Illeana Douglas thrilled guests at last night's (23MAR03) Independent Spirit Awards when she walked onstage in bondage gear - before poking fun at Michael Jackson and the acting CULKINs.

The GRACE OF MY HEART star conducted a sing-a-long tribute to dark masochist comedy Secretary while strapped to a pole, which ran from her left to her right hand across her shoulders.

She joked, "You think I'm here to present Secretary but I woke up like this.

"I checked into the CASA DEL MAR last night with a couple of those CULKIN kids and you can't tell me that MACAULEY didn't learn something from all those years hanging out with JACKO.

"I just want to say, 'KIERAN (Culkin), where's the key, buddy? I'm going to need those Polaroids back for my website."

Douglas then allowed Spirit Awards host John Waters to spank her on the backside.