Frostbite Movie Review

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It's been almost four years since the last good winter sports movie (the underrated Out Cold), and Frostbite simply doesn't make up for the lost time.

The story -- as it exists -- is classic mountain hijinks. There's a Snowboard Academy which our supposed hero Billy (Adam Grimes) goes to attend, and the community surrounding it is strange, unlike anything you've ever seen. Primarily the town is waging a class war -- and I'm not joking when I say the factions are called "richies" and "poories" -- with Billy finding himself torn between his richie friends in the Academy and the more down-to-earth poories, which includes his girlfriend (the charming Carmen Nicole). When not on the mountain and under the cruel thumb of coach (Peter Jason), the war can be found being waged at the local coffee shop "Naomibucks," operated by the raunchy Naomi (Traci Lords).

Despite a number of Playmates who appear topless in various hot tub scenes and some tired skiing and snowboarding footage (it feels like it's probably stock), Frostbite never comes close to redeeming itself for a ridiculous story that spends 80 minutes going nowhere before it simply stops in mid-stream, as if the crew ran out of money while the weather suddenly turned hot. It has a few moments that might be considered worthwhile -- especially if you're a cultish fan of Lords or want to see newcomer Nicole show off her acting chops -- but on the whole Frostbite stands as one of the worst films in the skiing/snowboarding genre, and that's saying something.

DVD extras are limited to a making-of featurette and four middling deleted scenes.

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Frostbite Rating

" Terrible "

Rating: R, 2004

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