Sarah Jessica Parker has been given the dubious honour of being named the 'unsexiest' woman alive in a new poll.
The Sex And The City actress was given the unflattering title in a poll for the website of men's magazine Maxim, with writers comparing the 42-year-old star to famous US racehorses Barbaro and Secretariat.
Discussing Parker - currently reprising her role as columnist Carrie Bradshaw for the movie adaptation of the hit series - one writer asked: "How the hell did this Barbaro-faced broad manage to be the least sexy woman in a group of very unsexy women and still star on a show with "sex" in the title?
"Pull your skirt down, Secretariat, we would rather ride your co-star Chris Noth!" he chivalrously added.
Troubled singer Amy Winehouse finished in second place in the poll, with Maxim staff bemoaning her "openly haemorrhaging translucent skin, rat's nest mane and lashes that look more like surgically attached bats", while Grey's Anatomy cast member Sandra Oh was voted the third unsexiest.
Madonna came in for some particularly scathing criticism from the site, after trading "pioneering sexuality for, like other old Jewish women, self-righteous bellyaching and rapid postnuptial deterioration".
It added: "Combine a Paris Hilton-like pet accessorising fetish - only for dirt-poor foreign babies - with a mug that looks Euro-sealed to her skull, and you've got Willem Dafoe with hot flashes."
And Britney Spears capped a year of well-publicised personal problems by rounding out the top five, having "lost the ability to perform, but gained two kids, two useless ex-husbands, and about 23 pounds of pudge", according to the website.